Terminology & Customs


Short for Albolene, it has been a popular choice of lubricant. It is marketed as a makeup remover.


Short for "masturbate."


A position assumed while masturbating, with legs spread wide apart.


BateWorld.com is the "Facebook for bators." Users have an ability to create a profile and blog, upload photos and videos to a gallery, and access a cam room (with a premium membership). 


Some men masturbate to quickly ejaculate and relieve tension when penetrative sex with a partner is not readily available. Other men (bators) masturbate (bate) because it is key to their sexual fulfillment and emotional well being; they delay ejaculation in order to prolong and savor it. They share it proudly with other men, to bond in brotherhood. For some, masturbation is spiritual, and may view their penis as something to be worshipped and served.

Bator Balm

Bator Balm is a popular choice of lubricant, made especially for male masturbation. It is the official lube of the Palm Springs Jacks. 

Blissed out

The state of mind achieved when a bator is enjoying intense pleasure.


A term used to address a fellow bator, in acknowledgement of the brotherhood that exists within the subculture.

Coach (verb)

To verbally encourage another bator to "go deep" into his bate. This may include instructions to start and stop stroking, and incorporation of key words such as "penis" and "masturbate" that he knows will provide "fuel" to that particular bator. If the bator uses poppers, a "coach" (noun) may direct him when to "take a hit," and how many times to do it. In a group setting, a coach may tap into a bator's exhibitionism by reminding him that he is on display and everyone is watching him. If you are taking on a role as coach, be sure that it is welcome by the recipient.

Cum denial

Refraining from ejaculation over an extended period of time (hours, days, weeks, months) in order to prolong sexual energy.


To use foreskin to envelope the head of another bator's penis.


To prolong the act of masturbation, and the pleasure it brings, by repeatedly reducing stimulation to the penis just in time to avoid ejaculation.


Anything that helps to further enjoy a bate. It could be visual (e.g. watching another bator, looking at porn), audible/verbal (e.g. talking dirty, being coached, chanting certain words),  aroma (e.g. body scent, poppers), or exhibitionism (e.g. being watched by a bate buddy or on cam by strangers).

Go deep

To lose yourself in the act of masturbation and reach a state of intense pleasure, akin to being "blissed out."


To physically express, in an exaggerated way, that you are experiencing intense pleasure (see "blissed out" and "go deep"). Often, a bator  who is gooning will become slack-jawed, drool, and roll his eyes up into his head.


To inhale (or "take a hit of") poppers.


Short for "frottage." To rub up against another bator with penises touching.


To masturbate with the use of poppers.


Having a primary sexual orientation to self, with the ability to enjoy sex (possibly penetrative) with another person. This term was coined by Palm Springs Jacks' founder. Visit Soloflexible.com.


Having a sexual orientation to self. Masturbation is the sole sexual outlet. Not to be confused with asexual, which indicates a person has no sexual interest.

Clinical vs Common Terms

Some bators like to say and hear clinical terms, such as "penis," "masturbate," "ejaculate," "semen" and "sperm." Other bators prefer common terms, such as "cock" and "beat off"; words like  "cum," "nut," and "jizz" can be used as a verb ("I'm going to jizz.") or a noun ("I eat my own jizz").